Phoenix and Kansas City - together at last!

Disclaimer: having a six-month old competing for my attention while I'm trying to watch AI definitely hinders my ability to be snarkariffic...and to actually pay attention to every minute of the show. Plus, I have no Tivo. Whoa (sic) is me.

Kara "the new fourth judge" DioGuardi is cute and seems to know what she's talking about, but I still can't figure out who/what she is - she needs to carve out an identity/develop a signature move/something. Also, she needs to stop referring to herself as "the new fourth judge" - we know already.

Phoenix happened yesterday and yesterday is a blur. And I'll be damned if I remember any names. But here is what I do remember:

• Opening montage of previous contestants - loved. Do it again please.
  
• Paula's glasses - love 'em. want 'em
• I like the new thing of putting the contestant's occupation on their bio banner during their audition (that is new, isn't it?).
  
• bikini girl - Would she have made it through if she'd worn braids, a gingham shirt and overalls? For sure Kara "the new fourth judge" wouldn't have gotten her panties in a wad. Sure, I also hate it when women use their flesh to distract (straight) men from being able to make a sober decision. Ryan was so not interested.
  
• There were some peeps I liked, but I didn't take names - I'll find some examples and get back to ya.

Kansas City was just now and, on account of my under-the-weatheredness and giving Nico a bath at the beginning, there is additional blurriness. Here's what I've got:

• G - stop being a hater. You know I heart Jason Castro and so, natch, I might have a soft spot for his bro, who isn't as cute as he is for the record.
• I dug the David Cook shout-outs/montage/homage. I almost forgot how much I loved him.
  
• I about died when the one guy did the Tally Hall song ("Banana Man"). Of course Simon didn't know it, but I love that the guy did, even though he did Tally Hall no favors by butchering the hell out of it. For the record, I've seen Tally Hall live twice and think they're all that.
• The guy with the dead wife made me sad and I'm glad that he sang well and got a goldenrod sheet of paper from a printer in need of a new toner cartridge.
  
• Is Simon nicer this season? I hope not.
• Dude(s). Please tell me my ears were deceiving me when a really homely guy was wearing a medal around his neck that he was awarded in elementary school.
• No more beggars please. We know you want it, but no is no.
  

By the time the Top 24 rolls around, I'll have Nico trained.
See you next week!